Who am I?

Just sitting here, looking through the images and asking myself: who I am? It was the fourth boudoir session with Marina and it made me realise how much I have changed. Not so much my looks but the way I think about my body. What stayed unchanged in all these years is that every photoshoot encourages me to pause and check-in with myself. Where am I? Who am I? How do I fit in? I am changing with each day.

When I recall my first boudoir session, I was 21-years-old and living on my own. I thought I am an adult, ready for life. Sometimes I am missing the naive girl I used to be, the one full of hopes but also hunted by demons of comparison and feeling of never to be enough. I was never proud of my body, even if everyone told me I looked great. Am I beautiful? Is this something to be proud of?

Today, I wouldn't say that I am confident. But I know myself much better, I have got respect for my body and I know that it is enough to be me. Marina's images helped me to reconnect with my body and taught me to think in another way about beauty, body and perfection. I am enough. I am good enough to love myself and feel comfortable in my own skin.

I imagine in a few years, I will have another Deja Vu while looking through a pile of recent boudoir images of me, it will remind me of every photoshoot that captured me at different stages of my life. I am grateful for this incredible experience that helps me to recognise my strengths and my vulnerability, and empowers me.