All you have to do is be yourself.
What is your story?
I am 41. I have lived life my own way. If I could write a letter to my younger self at different stages in my life I'd likely tell her to be kinder, gentler and more compassionate toward herself; and to others at times too. I'd tell her to let the things that worry her, soften and drop away; and that they will only cause her suffering. I would tell her that she's more beautiful than she knows and that all she needs to do is to love herself with that BIG love that she loves others with. These are the little love notes that I'd send to my younger self. At 41, I know that I am not perfect, not always easy and sometimes I am stubborn and difficult; I don't intend to be. But also, I'm ok with that because I know what the depths of me look and feel like. I am intimately attuned with my darkness, my watery emotions, my rage and my light. My story at this moment is that I call on connection with others who can receive me in all of this. I've been through a process this year where I had a lot of anxiety. A LOT. I don't get anxiety, not like this. What I've realised coming out of it is that I was 'trying' to be 'this', to be 'that', to be 'ok', to be 'normal', to be 'good' at what I do; in a time where the world around me was changing. Not only the greater world around me but my micro-world of home, work, friends were in a wash cycle and getting rid of the old; only I didn't really know what was happening at the time except that I felt like I'd been 'rung out'. All. The. Time. Hindsight, my dear friend, has now whispered in my ear "Darling, you were just trying very hard to act like nothing was changing. Do you see now, all you have to do is be yourself. The people that love you and the things that are right for you, will stick no matter what. And the people and things that aren't true will come off in the wash cycle. You just need to be a little more gentle on yourself Darling One". What is my story? Well, it seems (from this) it is a life of learning to be more gentle, slowly, but surely to be more gentle, more at peace and in more love.
Why did you want to do a boudoir shoot?
I love the art form of the female body. I love the lines, the textures, the round parts, the peaks, the dips, the dimples, the soft bits, the hard bits; I love it all. I love the sensuality that is the female form and I am in love and intrigued by the energy that an embodied woman emanates. Moving through the process of the boudoir shoot and having done a couple of the brand ambassador themed shoots with the whole team of total babes; there's something really present coming through for me. What I feel has thrown myself, and potentially other women, off their embodied feminine game is the false story that we're fed around a woman in their 'prime'. We're basically given an image of a woman from 17yrs (still a kid by the way) to about 26years old. How fucked up (sorry but it is) is that? Once a woman is 27 - 28 years old; she's widely considered past her prime because she's now moving towards her baby-making years. I have had several 'primes' in my 41 years, and all my 'primes' happened from 24 yrs onwards. Certainly, the majority of my big life wins and cycles of 'prime' occurred after I was 30 years old. What I love about these photoshoots, my own boudoir shoot and then the ones with our whole badass group of Brand Ambassadors; is that the images we're taking are capturing the whole woman. The images are capturing the sum total of all the wins, all the 'primes', all the choices, the good the bad and the ugly and we're all staring down the camera and bringing it all. I wanted to do the boudoir shoot because I am more than the things that are happening 'to' and around me, and I was hoping to capture a little bit of that. I am so happy with the result and feel we've captured, maybe even a little bit, more than I expected.
What was the location of your boudoir shoot and why did you choose it?
My shoot was done at the Treasury Hotel in Brisbane. I chose this location because I love the austere furnishings and decor and how it contrasts with soft, naked skin. I like the mood and shades it creates.
How did you feel preparing for the boudoir session?
I was excited and went into it aware of embracing the unknown. I was on day one of my cycles and when I arrived I was very tired after an hour or so drive from the Gold Coast. I started to touch up my make up and then Marina said "Christine, how far away are you from being ready? ...it's just that the light is perfect right now..." and that was it, from then on we were both in the zone together and nothing else existed outside of that.
What was it like to be naked/ half-naked in front of the camera?
I don't think I expected all the queues of how to pose and where to put this hand, or that foot; I hadn't thought about that part. So at first, my focus was taken on following queues. Then I caught that I was feeling a little detached from my own experience within it all and I reflected on what my intentions were for being there. It was at this moment that I anchored into my centre and began to bring 'all of me'. Marina also made it incredibly easy to flow with the process. She literally danced around at times like a little photo pixie. She literally danced, skipped and cheered whenever she felt we got a great shot; which was the whole way through the shoot. Honestly, Marina was a delight to work with and I didn't even think twice about taking off my pants lol.
How did you feel after the session?
What have you thought when you saw your boudoir images for the first time?
I have loved every stage in Marina's process throughout the whole experience, from the first consultation to the mood boards, to the shoot, to view the pictures. When I went to the viewing, I sat down and Marina played me a montage of my images to music. I had the biggest smile on my face that kept getting wider and wider. When the video finished Marina sat down next to me, I looked at her and with a smile that filled my whole face "wow" I said to her, and I cried. It was the pure movement of energy that brought the tears, it was the culmination of a life that lead to the moments captured within the images I had viewed. And in those images I could see my maturity, I could see the life I've lived, the decisions I've made; I saw my depth, presence and purpose. And it all moved through me at once.
Would you do it again?
One. Hundred. Percent. I'm pretty particular though so I'd probably only do it again with Marina.
Would you recommend a boudoir shoot to other women/men and why?
Yes. It's what you want it to be. If you want to celebrate; celebrate in your shoot. If you want to play; play. If you want to drop inward; do it and pierce the lens of the camera with your gaze. Whatever you need to do to enjoy it; bring that and do that, and have fun and enjoy. I found real freedom in working with Marina and I'd recommend it to anyone.
Do you have any tips for women/men who might be planning to do a boudoir shoot?
Reach out and ask the questions you need to ask; then just do it. I didn't have a clear vision of what I wanted the images to look like going into this experience. Looking at the images now; they are perfect and I wouldn't change a thing. Marina's professionalism really impressed me and continues to even now. If it's something you've been thinking about; I would honestly say just do it!
by Christine - Brand Ambassador
