Embracing my sensual side

What is your story?

I have been curvy or plus-size for most of my life and for a long time I let my size hold me back from doing things that I really wanted to do or from little things that would make my life better. Four or five years ago, after my mum passed away, I made a deal with myself that I would stop letting my size hold me back. Life's short and you only get one, so you may as well give it all you've got. So when I told myself I couldn't do something because I was too fat, I made it my business to prove myself wrong and go ahead and do it! And I did! This included smaller things like speaking up more in meetings at work and asking for what I wanted instead of waiting for things to come to me. I did Yoga Teacher Training, I worked overseas, I started wearing a bikini and with all of this came an enormous sense of pride, but more important freedom! Freedom from worrying what other people think!

In doing this for myself, I became acutely aware that most curvy and plus-size women hold themselves back; society has taught us to keep ourselves small, that we don't deserve to be seen or heard, to have the things that "straight-sized" people have. I know from my experience that this is not true. So I have made it my mission to help fat, curvy and plus-size women make fear their BFF so they can achieve their goals, follow their heart-dreams and live the kick-ass life they deserve. I do this through my work and by doing the things that I used to tell myself that I was too fat to do!

Why did you want to do a boudoir shoot?

I wanted to try a boudoir shoot because it was something I had never done before and had never really thought to do one until I saw this opportunity. It scared me a little bit, I have never really embraced my sensual side. As a larger woman, I felt that this was a side of me that I had to hide or that didn't exist and that it would mean being vulnerable and uncomfortable.

I am normally perceived as outgoing and fun, larger than life. But I also wanted to use this as an opportunity to explore my serious, more reflective side. As well as do something outside my comfort zone and to show other curvy women that they can embrace their full selves too!

What was location of your shoot and why did you choose it?

I chose the Ovolo Inchcolm Hotel, I loved the vintage / art deco style of the rooms. It felt luxurious and sensual. It also meant Marina and I, had more flexibility in the style of photo's we created - some are fun, others are sensual and my favourites are quite majestic!

How did you feel preparing for the session?

I enjoyed preparing for the shoot, from the insight Marina shared with me about images that I liked, to the mood board, choosing the location, coming up with ideas together. I loved rediscovering items in my wardrobe that we were able to use and sharing my ideas with Marina.

What was it like to be naked/ half-naked in front of the camera?

To be honest I was a bit nervous at first as I didn't know what to expect or how I would feel about it. We had a chat, worked through the outfits, put on some music and once I settled in I forgot that I had next to know clothes on; I focused on having fun and doing the poses to the best of my ability. Once I did this it became really empowering, I embraced it and was able to share my ideas with Marina.

How did you feel after the session? What have you thought when you saw your images for the first time?
After the session, I felt empowered...but in a way a bit unfinished, because I was in the shots I couldn't see the magic that Marina could see. I didn't have to wait too long to see the finished product and I was blown away! There wasn't one image that I didn't like, I love love love them all. I think Marina captured the brief perfectly, there was so much variety in the shots! I felt like a rock-star!!!

Would you do it again?

Hell Yes!

Would you recommend a boudoir shoot to other women/men and why?

Yes! It's an awesome way to explore different sides of your personality in a safe environment. As well as an opportunity

Do you have any tip for women/men who is planning to do a boudoir shoot?

My advice is the morning of your shoot is to do what you can to ground yourself, to get out of your head and into your body! Stay hydrated, use all your senses to get into the mood and have fun! Don't be scared to share your ideas with Marina if there is something you want to try!